FHM Top 100 Sexiest Women
Ok, just a bit of light-hearted entertainment while I chill out on the evening before my next race..
I always think the FHM Top 100 Sexiest is a lot of fun. I don't subscribe to FHM any more (too many copies lying round the house as it is) but I always buy it when the results are published and like to compare the tastes of the nation with my own. It invariably produces some amusing surprises!
The best example I can think of: Billie Piper came eleventh this year!! 20 places ahead of Jennifer Ellison and one place behind Jessica Simpson (who almost qualifies as a Swindon lass herself, the amount of time she spends round mine). I mean, all credit to her for making a comeback as an actress, and she plays the part of Rose in the excellent new series of Doctor Who with aplomb, but take it from me boys: I've seen her up close a few times and she's not really all that.
So, without further ado below are two top tens: the one in the magazine, and my top 10 of the top one hundred. So no place for Alicia Silverstone, alas - but with "Stormbreaker" set for release this summer, that could change next year..
FHM Top Ten.
1. Keira Knightley - the quintessential English rose, but a little too thin for my liking.
2. Keeley - who?
3. Scarlett Johansson. Who says the yanks don't have taste? She came top of the pile on that side of the pond.
4. Angelina Jolie. Quite popular with the ladies too, apparently.
5. Kelly Brook. No argument, but I like the girl next door look.
6. Cheryl Tweedy. Too much of a chav for me.
7. Beyonce Knowles. Like her better without the big hair.
8. Evangeline Lilly. I have honestly never heard of her before. Seriously. Is she in "Lost"?
9. Jessica Alba. Now we're talking..
10. Jessica Simpson. Nick Lachey's loss, some lucky man's gain.
JW Top Ten.
1. Scarlett Johansson (3). Great pout, great figure, great skin and she can act too.
2. Jessica Alba (9). An angel. Can't wait for Sin City 2.
3. Jennifer Ellison (31). Met her in London 18 months ago. Lovely, lovely girl. Hope she goes far.
4. Jessica Simpson (10). It seems one of your initials has to be J to be in my gang..
5. Kimberley Walsh (66). Or maybe a soft Yorkshire accent and a few curves will suffice. Can't believe she fared worse than the rest of the Fab Five, bar the ginger one.
6. Tara Reid (41). I never tire of all those late-night repeats of "Wild on Tara" on the E channel. I wonder why that is??
7. Myleene Klass (78). She'd be no good for me though - I read in an interview she's teetotal!
8. Kara Tointon (27). Making 'Enders watchable again.
9. Charlotte Church (40). Do yourself a favour Charl, ditch the fags and Gav and we'll see what a crazy chick you are next time I'm out in Cardiff..
10. Katie Holmes (79). The ultimate girl next door, she can climb through my bedroom window any time she wants. And she likes older men too! Enough to make anyone a Dawson's Geek..
Copyright © Jonathan Weedon, April 2006
I always think the FHM Top 100 Sexiest is a lot of fun. I don't subscribe to FHM any more (too many copies lying round the house as it is) but I always buy it when the results are published and like to compare the tastes of the nation with my own. It invariably produces some amusing surprises!
The best example I can think of: Billie Piper came eleventh this year!! 20 places ahead of Jennifer Ellison and one place behind Jessica Simpson (who almost qualifies as a Swindon lass herself, the amount of time she spends round mine). I mean, all credit to her for making a comeback as an actress, and she plays the part of Rose in the excellent new series of Doctor Who with aplomb, but take it from me boys: I've seen her up close a few times and she's not really all that.
So, without further ado below are two top tens: the one in the magazine, and my top 10 of the top one hundred. So no place for Alicia Silverstone, alas - but with "Stormbreaker" set for release this summer, that could change next year..
FHM Top Ten.
1. Keira Knightley - the quintessential English rose, but a little too thin for my liking.
2. Keeley - who?
3. Scarlett Johansson. Who says the yanks don't have taste? She came top of the pile on that side of the pond.
4. Angelina Jolie. Quite popular with the ladies too, apparently.
5. Kelly Brook. No argument, but I like the girl next door look.
6. Cheryl Tweedy. Too much of a chav for me.
7. Beyonce Knowles. Like her better without the big hair.
8. Evangeline Lilly. I have honestly never heard of her before. Seriously. Is she in "Lost"?
9. Jessica Alba. Now we're talking..
10. Jessica Simpson. Nick Lachey's loss, some lucky man's gain.
JW Top Ten.
1. Scarlett Johansson (3). Great pout, great figure, great skin and she can act too.
2. Jessica Alba (9). An angel. Can't wait for Sin City 2.
3. Jennifer Ellison (31). Met her in London 18 months ago. Lovely, lovely girl. Hope she goes far.
4. Jessica Simpson (10). It seems one of your initials has to be J to be in my gang..
5. Kimberley Walsh (66). Or maybe a soft Yorkshire accent and a few curves will suffice. Can't believe she fared worse than the rest of the Fab Five, bar the ginger one.
6. Tara Reid (41). I never tire of all those late-night repeats of "Wild on Tara" on the E channel. I wonder why that is??
7. Myleene Klass (78). She'd be no good for me though - I read in an interview she's teetotal!
8. Kara Tointon (27). Making 'Enders watchable again.
9. Charlotte Church (40). Do yourself a favour Charl, ditch the fags and Gav and we'll see what a crazy chick you are next time I'm out in Cardiff..
10. Katie Holmes (79). The ultimate girl next door, she can climb through my bedroom window any time she wants. And she likes older men too! Enough to make anyone a Dawson's Geek..
Copyright © Jonathan Weedon, April 2006
posted by Jon | 8:24 pm
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